CYBER GLEANINGS

Dear friends in Christ,

I wrote the following “Open Letter To My Father” for the June 1997 newsletter of St. Mark’s in LeRoy, New York.  At the time Kate was almost three and Dan was not quite three months old.

I wrote the piece as a reflection on Father’s Day.  It was and is intended as a reminder of the incredible power and importance of our witness and ministry in our homes and in our community.  Each of us has an opportunity to share our faith in ways that no one else can.

Many of you know that my father died last month.  I pray that this reflection on his witness to me will strengthen our sense of ministry to the world around us.

An Open Letter To My Father by the Rector

Dear Dad,

Recently Kara, Kate, Daniel and I joined two other families from St. Mark's to go to St. Paul's Cathedral in Buffalo for the "Children's Pilgrimage", an annual event in this diocese.  Six children and five adults went from our parish.

One of the aspects of the day which delighted me was seeing how comfortable our kids are in church, any church.  They charged right up the center aisle of the cathedral, stood in the lectors' spots, sat in the Bishop's chair, walked around the altar, and generally made themselves at home.  They were not disrespectful or badly behaved.  They were just at home.  They clearly knew that church is a place where they belong and are loved.  No doubt that they still have some etiquette to learn but that's also true for Kate at our dinner table.

As I helped supervise the kids it occurred to me that it is now my privilege to share with our children one of the greatest gifts that you have given me.  I don't know that I have ever made a point of telling you how much the example of your faith in God and dedication to the Church has meant to me.  I want to thank you for raising me in the Church, for modeling devotion to God and to the community of faith, and for caring enough to insist that church, like school, was not an optional activity for me.

Though there were a few exceptions, I remember going to church with you every Sunday and most Holy Days.  You have always been one of the busiest people I knew.  No matter how crazy your schedule was I knew that we would go to church....and I treasured that time.  It wasn't until I was a teenager that it occurred to me that busy people might choose not to go to church.

I also remember that you would talk with us about our faith.  You really made quite a point of teaching us.  I enjoyed having you as my Sunday school teacher for a couple of years. I also remember that time in Mississippi when you wanted to give us religious instruction at home.  I think I fought you tooth and nail on that but I also got the message that religious knowledge was important.  More than that, I saw you once again put your time and energy into the faith that you said was so important. 

One of the most powerful examples that you set was to pray with us.  You or Mom said bedtime prayers with us every night just as I now do with my own daughter.  I still just take it for granted that we pray before every meal.  Perhaps the most dramatic memory is those candlelit evening devotions during Advent!  I loved what Santa brought at Christmas but I was always clear that Jesus' birth was the reason for the celebration.

It wasn't even always what you did with me that nurtured me into a love of God and a devotion to the Church.  I watched you serve St. Thomas' and other parishes in a variety of ways not the least of which was to be on the vestry during some very trying times.  I know that some of the changes in the Episcopal Church were very hard for you.  Still you didn't walk away. I can't even imagine what it must have been like when that priest that you had known for so long was finally caught in the act of adultery.  Still you have stayed involved.  I figure that you must think that the Church is pretty important even when it is disappointing or painful.  I have come to agree.... though I didn't always. 

I remember a time when, as a teenager, I argued hard that I shouldn't have to go to church, that the church was full of hypocrites, and I didn't need to go.  I believe you told me that I didn't have to go to our church but that I was going to worship someplace.  You'd even allow me to explore other religions if I needed to.  But as long as you still had authority to set rules for me, I would worship God someplace.  It seemed you weren't about to let me pretend that my faith shouldn't shape my weekly life.  I stayed at our church.

Father's Day is coming up and it seems like a good time to thank you.  Moreover I wanted to share your example with the people of this parish that I care about so very much.  I already do that by trying to teach my children as you taught me but I'm the priest here and folks figure I'm supposed to be "churchy".  You're a CPA.  I figure your example is a little more impressive.  It sure was for me.

                                                                        Love,

                                                                                    Wilson, Jr.